Intuition = Experience?
These are my random thoughts, only slightly filtered.
Sometimes situations and people are like magnets to our lives, our spirits and even simply our personalities. Believe it or not, I was inspired to write this post when I was playing with some blackboard magnets in class waiting for my students to finish writing their new vocabulary. Two of the magnets just wouldn't stick and would repel each other even when forced together for the shortest of times. Besides being transported back to high school science class, I was struck with the obvious realization that certain people and jobs and situations will simply never be for us, respectively. Finding your guiding light is not an easy thing, but thanks to trial and error, also intuition, you can lessen or eliminate being in a position that doesn't serve you.
And I know this talk can sound too abstract or impractical (because there are many people who are not in control of their circumstances but who so desperately want to be). However, I think that's the beauty of sharing opinions, experiences, and ideas like this - they are open to interpretation: not one person's life is identical to another's. What I'm trying to get at is that if we can be mindful enough to recognize how we're feeling around our "friends," family and lovers, maybe we won't have to wait for inevitable red flags to appear before we change something we don't like. Now I want to try and preempt conflicting thoughts by making a point: when I say 'inevitable red flags,' that's not pessimistic Nkem showing up where's she's not wanted; that's realism. Since nobody is perfect and people don't live, breathe, and act in order to please others (all the time anyway), we're bound to come across different attitudes that don't align with ours at points (beware of true red flags though; those are warning signs). That's not to say to dismantle your kinship because you had a difference of opinion or your moods aren't in the same place. That's to say, irrespective of the other human in the equation, does this union, this situation - does it feel right?
The whole magnets metaphor is a symbol of, I think, life's most pervasive nuance. It reminds me of having a relationship with self, with spirit and soul, with God, before having a relationship with other, or having a relationship with trends, ideas, or material things. I sure have been in scenarios that weren't for me, and I learned so much about myself through them - like how if I could minimize all the times I'm ever in a place that doesn't fill me, I would in a heartbeat. Life will never be ideal, and I will maintain that when we're put in uncomfortable situations, that's when we learn the most about ourselves. But "life is short" and if we can try to absorb its nutrients, not the garbage, I think we should do that.
Thanks for listening. :)